Monday, January 16, 2012


Well, last week we got our monthly update on the waiting list for our baby girl......

drumroll please......

What's that.....12?????  What????


Seriously big ol' BOO!!!!!!

so after a week of pouting.....which I have done - don't worry though, you wouldn't know that I was pouting, I generally keep it to myself. are welcome for that....can you imagine if I pouted outloud?  Let me tell you - it ain't pretty people. 

Those who know me know that I am somewhat of an outgoing personality....I try to reel myself in but it's REALLY hard.  However, I do have a very quiet, reflective side.  (how many people just fell over?) 

but it's true, I do.  So this past week I reflected on things ALOT.  What I remembered is:

1.  No one told me this was going to be easy
2.  No one said, "Hey, Fran this is all in your timing and what you want."

and what I learned is....
1.  I REALLY want things to be easy!  Seriously, I want it to be REALLY, REALLY easy.....(I know - you would've thought I could have at least have learned that one by now.) 
2.  I want it to be my timing!  Why can't it be my timing!!!  Come on God....I know you got her picked out for us.  I know that the child that is meant to be in our family is in the world......CAN'T YOU JUST MAKE HER COME HOME!!!!  It makes perfect sense to makes perfect sense to everyone around me.....What is taking so long???

As I go through this.....our pastor continues to get on my nerves - cause what does he preach on?.....


*Side note:  (our pastor's name is James - so it's funny - James on James (okay, maybe just funny to me but I giggle internally everytime he says, "So what James is trying to tell us is....")

We have spent three weeks in Chapter 1....and what does he spend time talking about?  How in faith, in those times where we don't understand God's plan instead of losing faith and blaming God as if He somehow messed this up - it is simply resting in....God, I don't see Your plan here.....but help me see it.'s that simple?

There are moments where I don't see it God.  I don't see why we don't have her picture.  I don't understand why we aren't on our way back home with her figuring out our new world together as a family of five.  But help me see.......

There may be things that Maggie is experiencing that will be developing her into who she is supposed to be.  There may be things that Eric and I are experiencing or waiting to experience to give us a capability or the skill to handle a situation that we may have otherwise not have known.....Ethan and Reagan may be growing and learning things......Who knows?  God knows.  And I will trust and I will rest in that, hard as it is, cause I would much rather have this whole adoption thing behind us and be a family......just sayin'.   

**Side note #2 - He did preach on the whole orphan and widow thing this week - thought to myself before he started, "I got this one."  Don't you know he had to go all Karate Kid and throw a punch in there I wasn't seeing....let's just leave it that he challenged me.  I'm good with helping orphans....I'm good with helping widows....but really those needy folk in between......really?  If you are interested, check it out here.....://

(PS he doesn't give me any kickbacks for referring anyone to view his sermons)  :) 


  1. I Love you Fran Runner and just like you told me It will all work out...There iss still a flight going there were are just not sure when..Im praying oh and soory you were slapped in the face just like I
    Raven Downs

  2. Thanks for the update I was just thinking of you. Can't wait to meet Maggie. It's so amazing how bittersweet our struggles are. Frustrated with not fully understanding why (at first at least) but in the middle of it all getting to rest in the peace and love of Jesus. He's got our backs, He's the Man! ;)

  3. Hang in there Chica! God prepares you in many ways, one is by having or should I say making us & teaching us to patiently wait. He might have something in store for your family that you are not fully aware of right now. You said it best, he is preparing you, your husband, kids,& Maggie. Love you all & continuing to pray for you all!

  4. keeping you and your family in my prayers. But, as you said--everything happens in God's time, not ours. It's so hard for us to be patient, well it's hard for me. Keep smiling that beatiful smile. love, Peggy O'Daniel

  5. You are on an amazing journey, and I admire you for it. I believe, as hard as it is to be patient, that it all is in His timing...not ours. I want to thank you for a post on Pinterest about "Kisses from Katie", and what she has to say about getting ready and being ready, and it really isn't about whether we are ready or not, but when He is ready for us to experience something. As my life goes on, this is something that I'm realizing much more all the time. Much love Fran and thank you!!!